


Prescription

by bjelkemander



Series: The Black Dog [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-09-01 08:50:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16761895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjelkemander/pseuds/bjelkemander
Summary: Asriel and Frisk spend time together.





	Prescription

Click.

You were snapped from your fugue by the door unlatching, your eyes still locked to the plain white clock across the room. 2:00 sharp. The hour had really snuck up on you; you’d been so absorbed in the slow, mechanical tick of the second hand that you’d barely even kept track of how long it’d been since...

“Frisk?”

Your mind followed your ears as you snapped over to stare at the door, a gentle smile emerging on your face. There he was. The God of Hyperdeath. The Prince of the Underground. Asriel Dreemurr. Right now, though, just your Azzy.

He reached up to remove his glasses, burying his face in the nape of his shirt to wipe away the few remaining undried tears. You were swiftly on your feet, at his side immediately, gently wiping at his face before drawing him in for a warm kiss.

He squeaked softly, clearly still conscious of the open door behind him. You only held the kiss a short time; long enough that it didn’t just seem customary, short enough that the young prince wouldn’t get too embarrassed. He didn’t like opening up like this in public. But then again, this was meant to be a quiet, safe place, wasn’t it?

“I think she still needs to speak with you. I’ll just wait out here.” He said softly, lowering your hand from his blushing cheek. “I just need a few moments anyway.”

He was speaking, at least. Usually after these sessions, he turned mute, preferring to just spend the drive home mumbling and moving his head in response to your questions. The first time he’d come, he spent the next four hours near-catatonic before attempting to apologise and breaking down in tears.

It was easier now. Even if he didn’t know what to feel, he knew better what to avoid.

Heading into the office, you shut the door quietly behind you. The therapist was still sitting in her place, apparently having decided to occupy herself with her documents as you had gone in for the kiss. It was somewhat comforting. That’s why you’d decided to start taking Asriel to her, after all. She was discrete.

“Thank you, as always, for bringing Asriel along today.” She began, finishing her signatures and stowing the documents on the desk - it had grown to be a significantly thick dossier. “I know these sessions can drag on sometimes, but Asriel appreciates having somebody to assist him with this.”

You turned to face the therapist, glancing up from the torn and scrunched scraps of paper on Asriel’s side of the desk. She was a tall, slender woman, probably shy of... you weren’t really sure of her age. She kept herself well, though. Conservative hairstyle, white and navy outfit. It was all very stylish, yet consummately professional.

After all, that was all part of why you’d chosen this therapist in the first place. Despite Asriel’s return, a part of him still needed saving. It was something beyond what you knew how to fix, or even describe. It had taken days, weeks, even months, but Asriel was starting to open up, to both you and the therapist. You considered that she may be the only human since Asriel had returned that he trusted. Other than yourself, of course.

“As you know, I’m limited in the extent to which I may disclose details of matters Asriel chooses to discuss at these meetings.” You had a pretty good sense of what was brought up, of course. The night terrors and depressive spirals often made the issues fairly clear.

“That being said, there are certain matters which I may reveal to you, in your capacity as his partner.” She always seemed to have a flickering smile when she used that term. Her professional demeanour rarely flinched, but you had a hunch she still found the idea of a monster/human relationship to be novel. Not that it seemed to affect her work.

“Asriel has indicated to me that his current medication regimen is... unsatisfactory.” She sighed, rising from her seat with Asriel’s dossier. “I’m aware I’ve discussed this matter with you previously, and advised you to continue to support him in adhering to his prescription.” She took a large folder from the bookshelves, laying it at at her desk. “I may, however, have an alternate prescription that he may like to try... with your permission.” She let out an uncharacteristic grunt as she snapped the dossier back into the folder. It seemed substantially heavier as she replaced it on the shelves.

Returning to her seat, the therapist laid down a prescription pad. “I will say, first, that he appears to be doing wonderfully with the bulk of his medication. However, I will agree that there are issues with the medication currently being used to treat more... challenging aspects of his condition. I believe you’ve raised the narcolepsy issues before yourself.” You nodded. The large bruise that had developed on Asriel’s forehead after that incident meant it hadn’t been a long conversation.

“I would like to start him on this new course of medication. Still experimental, but it has been demonstrated safe for monsters. I feel like it’s a good fit for him.” Scribbling out a prescription on the pad, she seemed to bite her lip. “I will advise you, however... There will continue to be side effects to the medication.” Your throat swelled. Asriel wasn’t going to like hearing that.

“The compounds known to cause narcoleptic symptoms are not present in a standard dose.” She continued, tearing off the prescription and handing it to you. “There is significant chance, however, of the patient experiencing reduced libido and muted emotional output.”

You gulped. You knew all of those words, but weren’t sure what they meant in sequence. Did she say something about libido?

Seeming to sense your worry, the therapist shook her head. “Don’t worry, those are just the medical terms. The likely side effects simply may reduce how intensely Asriel feels things, sexually and emotionally.” She seemed to blush on the last few words - maybe she was wondering how it all worked with that. “I would recommend, however, that you have him read this.” She reached to a low bench, grabbing for a pharmaceutical flyer.

“This flyer is intended to inform the patient on what to expect with this particular medication. You may find it helpful too.” Flipping through the flyer, it all seemed very technical - chemical names, side effects, legal information. Nothing about what was most important, though - how Asriel would feel about it. 

“I understand he may be reluctant to switch medications, especially with such side effects. It’s not necessary to force it on him. I recommend allowing him to finish his current course before beginning this one, but you should let him know about this proposal as soon as you can.” Sighing, you nodded. What else could you do? You certainly didn’t know what to do with that goat’s mind.

Rising to her feet, the therapist offered a sympathetic smile. “Like I said, he may not show it clearly, but Asriel really does appreciate having you to assist him.” You followed her across the room, offering a nod as she reached for the door for you. “You should be proud of how much he’s achieved with your help and companionship.”

Your own face burning a little now, you smiled broadly before slipping out the door. Asriel seemed to notice your exit as quickly as you had his, smiling as though relieved you hadn’t been occupied long. “Well... Let’s get going.” You grabbed your coat from the rack, struggling to wrap the heavy fabric around yourself. Asriel had an easier time of it; his thick winter fur meant he usually only had to thrown on a cardigan.

“Do you think we could get something to drink before we head home? I was sitting in that office for so long...” He said softly, following you out the door onto the campus. You raised an arm to shield your eyes; the sun was beaming, but the heat didn’t seem to cut through - you could feel the chill in your bones. Nonetheless, you turned to him and nodded, slipping your car keys back into your pocket.

You’d taken Asriel to the espresso bar along the Riverfront District before his first visit to the therapist, just a little over two years ago now. It was a few months after he’d returned. That had been a hard day, two years down the track, as well. At first, everything seemed so fine, like nothing had ever happened... The innocent young goat you’d exchanged tearful farewells with back in the Underground was back. Just, somehow, substantially older, physically and mentally. Asgore often remarked that he’d looked as such as a young buck. You didn’t quite believe him, but it at least gave you a sense of where Asriel was at.

That was physically, of course. Mentally, the maxim of ‘happily ever after’ did not pan out; something you’d been very reluctant to accept at first. Your mind was changed very quickly, however. You’d been the one to take the initiative; researching therapists, organising appointments, coaxing him into leaving the house. You’d left home nearly six hours before his first appointment. 

It took nearly two hours and three return trips before you finally made it to New Hope. You’d both sat in that espresso bar for hours, in near complete silence. Asriel might have had nearly three sips of water in that time; you can’t remember ordering anything for yourself. There was nothing to say because the feelings involved occupied both of you: rejection, regret, disappointment, fear.

You still weren’t saying much, but the tone was much different these days. As you strolled down the vibrant civic centre that encompassed much of the Riverfront District, Asriel no longer followed lockstep behind, his eyes locked directly on the back of your head. He followed behind, still, but at his own pace, alternating between staring at the passing boats along the ebbing river, and studying the grand architecture of the civic centre.

Compared to the open plan and dominating atmosphere of the civic centre, the espresso bar was somewhat the inverse. Neatly slotted into the facade of an old colonial building, the interior was small, yet never felt cramped. Despite near proximity to other groups and couples, the close walls made it feel private. Asriel disliked staying put in public places, but if he had to, he preferred it to be spots like this - small, hidden, lonely.

Taking a table in the corner, Asriel squirrelled in beside you, being sure to keep his back to both walls. Someone quickly made it over to take your order - you grabbed a menu and motioned to both your regular orders. One espresso, one cappuccino - one sugar in the second. Asriel may have styled himself as the God of Hyperdeath, but his coffee order made you wonder how you could have ever believed it.

Sighing loudly, Asriel finally seemed to relax as the waiter hurried back behind the bar. He mostly stayed still, but let his weight flop back into you, resting against your shoulder. “Thanks, Frisk” He murmured, snuggling into your heavy coat. “I guess this is kinda the routine now, huh?” He said with a slight laugh. “It’s nice... This can be our spot, I guess.”

You smiled, reaching over to rest an arm over his back and stroke it gently. Asriel was still trying to become comfortable with you the two of you acting as a couple in public. It wasn’t that he was ashamed, he’d explained, tears suddenly having welled at the thought he’d be so cruel. He just didn’t want to embarrass you, or hurt you, or get you hurt, or...

It was all a bit unlikely. But you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. So, you tried to keep things light. A short back rub here, a gentle thigh squeeze there. Maybe you’d hold hands on a long train trip. You’d only ever push him as far as he’d let you. And you’d already figured out the subtle signs of him feeling scared, angry or upset.

Reaching back, you winced slightly as the therapist’s flyer speared you in the arm. Bit of a rude reminder. You figured it was as good a time to discuss the new medication with Asriel as any, though. Sighing, you reached into your pocket and pulled the flyer from your jacket along with the prescription. Handing them to Asriel, you watched as he blinked in confusion before rifling through the papers, his brow furrowing. “Frisk, what are...”

He trailed off as he read the notes on the prescription, a quiet choke escaping his throat. “I should have known she’d talk to you about this.” He said quietly, a hint of rarely heard anger in his voice. You reached back to stroke his back, gently shifting in closer next to him. “Frisk, please...”

He shook slightly as he read back over the prescription, reluctantly cross-referencing with the flyer. “Reduced... Muted... Suppressed...” He gulped as he glanced down at himself for a moment, briefly patting at his chest. “Reduced emotional output.” Another choke emerged from his throat as you could feel him begin to breathe heavily. You braced your arm around his neck, quickly taking hold of his free hand as you brought yourself to face him.

“I-It’s going to happen again, isn’t it, Frisk? If I take this pill...” A high-pitched cry briefly squeaked out, Asriel shaking his head deeply. “My feelings... I don’t want to become him again...” Shushing Asriel softly, you reached up to stroke at his ears, squeezing his hand firmly. A few tears splashed from his eyes to the lenses of his glasses, soaking them.

You both sat like this for a few minutes, Asriel’s breaths coming short and fast, your palm on his back long and slow, your hand in his firm and steady. If he was going to go through something like this, you were at least relieved it was relatively private. Not least because it was hard to conceal a weeping goat, but Asriel always became so self-conscious afterward.

Feeling your partner’s breathing begin to stabilise, you squeezed his hand tight before releasing. As he gingerly turned back toward your eyes, you removed his glasses and leaned in, kissing him slowly but deeply. You held it for a few moments before pulling away, staring back into his eyes as you wiped away his remaining tears.

“Aha... S-Sorry Frisk… I just, well-“ You kissed him again to force him to pause - it never failed to remind him to breathe as he spoke. “Sorry. I was just thinking of what she told me about the side effects, I’ve been thinking about it this whole walk here...” He bit his lip, staring back down at his lap, as though ashamed. “Sorry. I don’t want to be difficult.”

He shifted his weight away from you, turning his attention back to the flyer before sighing. “You don’t understand how hard it can be. You don’t know what it’s like to lay down to sleep with you, not being sure if I’ll be treating you the same way the next morning... These pills just make me feel frozen sometimes. Like I’m stuck in whatever mood I find myself in.”

Reaching back over to grab your hand, he busied himself in stroking your palm with his fingers as he read on, lips pursed. “You don’t know what it’s like to not have feelings... I just can’t understand how a pill that makes me feel that way can help.” Looking back up at you, he stared sadly into your eyes, as if begging you to offer some kind of panacea to his torment.

You stared back, equally lost. It had always been difficult to know what to tell Asriel at times like this. It felt like a betrayal, and a failure on your part. Here you were, the person he’d entrusted his wellbeing to, and you couldn’t even tell him something he needed to hear.

But maybe you could show him.

Shucking off your jacket, you grabbed hold of Asriel’s hand, much to his surprise. “Frisk?” He repeated, looking to you less with fear than curiosity. Placing his hand upon your chest, you closed your eyes, focusing deeply. Focusing inward.

Focusing toward yourself.

Toward your SOUL.

Toward your love.

Toward your hopes.

Toward your dreams.

Toward your love, hopes, and dreams.

For yourself, and for him.

For both of you.

Together.

You almost felt whiplashed as you were jerked back into reality; it was as if you’d been hit in the head with a bat. Asriel cried out as he saw you fall backward. “Oh, Frisk, are you-“ You shook your head quickly in response, far more concerned for how he’d come out of the experience. Looking back up, however, you were surprised to see your concerns unwarranted - Asriel smiled at you warmly; out of breath, but otherwise calm.

He sighed gratefully as he reached forward to brace his arms against you, wrapping them loosely around your neck. “I-I think I get what you mean.” He said softly, the panicked urgency in his voice having evaporated.  
“I-I know I’m not like that anymore. It’s just... My thoughts are silly sometimes.” He blushed slightly as he glanced back up at you, taking his chance now to peck you on the lips.

You didn’t respond at all for a few seconds, still slightly dazed. It was a strange way to connect, but there were times where it was all you could do for Asriel. You found it hard enough to speak as it was; this was easier, and got your point across far more vividly anyway. Blinking a few times, you smiled in response to the kiss, snapping back fully as you noticed your drinks arriving.

You downed the espresso like a shot; you needed a pick-me-up after that. Asriel giggled at your haste, taking a moment to deliberately stir at his cappuccino. “As I was saying, Frisk… I think I understand.” He sighed before taking a sip, licking at his upper lip to ensure the foam didn’t stick. “I’ll try the pills if you think it’ll help, just... Please...” He paused as he drew a deep breath, looking up to stare into your eyes seriously. “Make sure I stay myself.”

You simply nodded in response, but that was all you needed to do. It was perhaps the most surprising aspect of your relationship, but despite everything, Asriel trusted you completely. Maybe it was your determination. Maybe it was you, returning to farewell him, in his most desperate moments. Maybe it was just disordered emotional imprinting. But for all that it was worth, he knew that he could trust you.

Glancing at your watch, you eyes widened for a second. You didn’t realise it was this late. Not that it was dark soon, but it was a long drive back to Outer Hope, and the roads were wild at the best of times. The predicted snowfall certainly wouldn’t help. Asriel seemed to notice your concern, sighing as he slid away from your embrace and brushed himself down. “I guess we should get going, yeah.”

Shuffling your coat back on and sliding out a few banknotes, you nodded gently at the barista as you passed and placed the bill on the bar. Making your way to the fencing of the riverfront, you sighed as you took a moment to stare out at the skyline, Asriel joining you at your side.

New Hope was founded not long after the Barrier was breached, about... 16 years ago now? There was a major ceremony the year after Asriel returned, but he naturally hadn’t been involved - the crowds were the least of concerns at that stage. The city was intended to be a reconciliation project, proof that humans and monsters could live together despite their history.

It was encouraging. If deep wounds like those between humans and monsters could begin to heal, then it gave hope that Asriel’s could fade too. You studied the skyline carefully, trying to determine if the boundaries had grown since you last saw it. Cranes littered the gaps between buildings; jibs, scaffolding and cargo littered the hard angles between the towers and infrastructure.

Looking west, you gazed down the Ebott River toward the Strait, the twin peninsulas that framed the setting sun over New Hope. The Strait had recently been mounted by a heavy steel bridge that arched across the bay, yet leaving the pristine waters untouched by foundations. The structure was recently developed, a pioneering fusion of human engineering and monster mysticism. Asriel had darkly joked once or twice that once his brain was fixed, maybe you could take him for a walk across it.

“It really can be as beautiful as you said.” Asriel said softly, gazing back from the distance to focus on you. You raised a eyebrow, smirking slightly as he blushed. “The surface, I mean. Not just outside the house.” Shaking your head with a smile, you took your chance and embraced him, right along the Riverfront.

“F-Frisk!” He cried out, eyes wide as he realised how loud he’d been. He glanced about momentarily, before suddenly realising something and looking back to you. “Oh, I guess... This is fine.” He bit his lip but then released, drawing in a deep breath. “I should trust you... I think I’m starting to realise I can.” Sighing, he let his weight sink into you, letting his eyes close as he held you against his chest.

For all that had happened that day, this was almost the biggest shock - Asriel holding you to his chest in public. For such a shy, complicated monster, he was physically quite large; taller than you at full stance, in fact. Normally, you only ended up here in the deepest of sleeps, when Asriel would cling onto you as he tried to forget what he’d just woken up from. It was comforting, though. For as much care as you gave to Asriel, you sometimes forgot to care for yourself in return.

Sheepishly glancing at you as he set you back down, Asriel laughed softly. “Why don’t you lead the way... I can never recognise your car.” Leaning in to the goat once more, you smiled - things could be okay. You could both make it. Together.


End file.
